A Christmas Reminder
by Love From A Muggle
Summary: He's always hated Christmas, when Lily died, it made him hate Christmas more till a little reminder came along helping him to think there's always hope for the hopeless. Severus Snape


Disclaimer: I don't own it.

For: Slytherin Head- a fantastic beta reader, and for Ariana Ethaitrius Happy Birthday. I couldn't write Hermione/Severus, but I know you love Severus so this is for you.

_Christmas 1981_

A cold winter chill nipped playfully at his face as he stood by the pond watching the young ones skate without a care in the world. One stood out to him the most. She had red hair exactly like, no. he promised himself he wouldn't think of her. Lily had been his only friend in the world. Voldermort had broken his trust when she was killed. The memory was too painful for Severus. He preferred to be alone. He ate alone, he dined alone and he lived alone. He couldn't wait to go back to school after the Christmas Holidays. He could have stayed at school, but he wanted to be alone. And at home, he was always alone.

Severus turned around to leave the happy children alone just as a snowball was thrown at his back. He turned back to see all the children but one laughing at him. They expected him to yell at them. Instead, he did nothing and walked away. Another was thrown just as the children were leaving the lake. He turned around again to see who threw the snowball, but saw one girl alone still skating. She did a figure eight perfectly, as she came around the last circle of another figure eight, she looked up at him and smiled. She halted to a stop inches in front of him. The snow was blocking her from coming right next to him.

Severus froze. She stared up at him and grinned. Green eyes stared up at him taking him back to a happier time. He shook his head. This child was not Lily. Lily had died. This child is not related to Lily at all. She moved her red curly hair out of her face.

"Hello, My name's Charlotte . Don't mind Joshua, he's a meanie," She said sweetly. It were as though Angels! spoke to Severus.

"Why are you talking to me?" He asked her rudely.

"Because you looked sad. Like you lost a friend," She admitted. Children were so innocent, but they knew more than people gave them credit for.

"I have lost a friend. And I am not in the mood to talk about it," he said coldly. He started to turn again, but her words stopped him.

"What was her name?" She asked kindly. He turned around and glared at the little child.

"Who said it was a her? It could have been a he for all you know," He snapped. Charlotte still smiled at him. He was being as rude as he could, but her attitude towards him changed didn't change.

" You just look like you lost a dear friend to you and I instantly thought it was a girl," She admitted honestly. Charlotte pulled her blue pea coat close to her and shivered. "well it's cold. I better be getting home," She replied. He didn't say anything. "What's your name?" She asked not letting him go.

"Severus," He replied gritting his teeth.

"Severus, it's different. But I like it. Severus?" She piped up.

"Yes?" he gritted.

"Happy Christmas. Just try having one kay?" She said happily. She sat down on the cold bench, took off her skates and replaced them with her boots. She stood up, hung her skates over her shoulder and waved at Severus before she left him.

_Summer 1982_

The summer sun sunk beneath the trees as Severus sat at the little pond where he knew the children would ice skate during the winter. He never moved, never looked at anyone, and never talked to anyone. He still felt guilty for Lily's death. His mind often wandered to the little girl he met the year before. A water balloon hit Severus at the back of his head. He groaned. Not this again. He turned around and saw the boy Joshua as Charlotte called him with a bunch of his friends. This time, Charlotte was with them.

"Leave him alone," Charlotte called to her brother. She went to his arm and prevented him from throwing another balloon at Severus. In return Joshua accidentally knocked her down on the ground. Charlotte started crying.

"I'm telling Mummy," Charlotte cried to her brother. Severus stood up, went over to Charlotte and helped her up.

"Dare to throw one at me again?" He said angrily at the boy. The boys stopped laughing and ran off to the park. Charlotte looked up at him. She was the only child that wasn't afraid of him.

"Thank you Severus," She smiled through the tears.

"You're not hurt?" He asked.

"No," She said.

"Good. See you," He started walking.

"Wait!" He turned around as she called to him.

"Did you have a nice Christmas?" She asked.

"It was Okay," He replied honestly.

"Well that's better than a horrible Christmas," She smiled at him.

_Christmas 1982_

Severus found himself at home again for Christmas. He was alone. Again. He hated being alone, but the life of a Death Eater made everyone alone. He also found himself parked in front of the bench again watching the children. He no longer felt angry at the incident during the summer. Sure, he heard whispers as the children played in the snow. But he didn't care. He wasn't here for them. He was there for Charlotte . To protect her.

" Charlotte , be careful. There's a weak spot in the ice over there by the trees," Her brother Joshua called out to her. _'So the git did care about his sister,' _Severus thought. Charlotte found out too late. She skated over before the warning to the ice and fell through. Severus jumped up, raced to her as the children around him were panicking. He dove in the cold water and grabbed the little girl. He came out with her and put her on the snow bank next to the ice. She wasn't breathing. He had gotten to her too late. Everyone around her froze. Joshua did nothing to try to save his sister. Severus shivered, glared at the boy and yelled.

"GO GET SOMEONE NOW," He ordered. It didn't take someone long before they ran and got help.

_Summer 1983_

The summer months dragged on as Severus found his way walking around the home. He looked and saw the pond. The dreadful nightmare of the Christmas before made him turn towards the pond. He sat down in front of the pond at his usual spot. His nightmare came back. The one of him rescuing Charlotte too late. The only child he ever cared for died right before his eyes. He heard a noise from behind him and turned around. Joshua stood a few feet away.

"Do you need something?" He grunted. Joshua glared at him.

"You didn't save Charlotte ," He said angrily.

"Neither did you," Severus snapped back. The boy's hatred from Severus went imminently to tears. Severus stood up, went to Joshua and handed him a tissue.

"Why didn't you help your sister?" He asked calmly.

"I was scared okay? Is that what you wanted me to say? I was scared. I didn't know what to do. The next thing I knew you were in the water helping her. Why did you help her?" Joshua asked.

"Because she was the only Child that has ever been nice to me. And that's saying something because I work with children," He admitted to someone other than himself.

"Mum was happy you tried to help. She asked who you were and how you knew Charlotte . Charlotte kept you quiet from mum. She didn't want mum to worry," The last part slipped out of Joshua's mouth before he could stop himself.

"Worry about what?" Severus wondered out loud.

"Well everyone said you were creepy, and that you lived alone and didn't have any friends. They called you weird," He paused. "hey Mr, I'm sorry about throwing the snowball and the water balloon at you," Joshua said and stopped crying.

"Call me Severus," He said frowning. "I knew it was you. Charlotte said so,"

"I really am sorry. It was a dare," Joshua stood in silence for a few minutes. He looked at the man before him. " Charlotte loved you," He admitted.

"She did?" He was confused.

"Yeah. She always talked about you. She was sad that one Christmas she first met you. Said you looked really unhappy. She made you a card and asked me to give it to you but I never did," Joshua pulled something out of his back pocket and handed it to Severus. A folded up card he held tightly in his hands.

"Thank you," Was all Severus could say.

"I'm sorry I didn't get it to you sooner. I just thought Charlotte was a crazy eleven year old. I didn't understand how much you meant to her till you tried to save her. She wanted you to have a Christmas card. She thought you didn't get them," Joshua admitted again to Severus.

"She's right about that. I'm not well liked," He admitted to the teen. "It wasn't your fault you know. You did warn Charlotte ," He said finally.

"I know. But it was too late. I just keep thinking I should have been the one to try to save her instead of standing there like a coward," He frowned and looked towards the ground.

"Just remember someone tried to save her," Severus said.

"Yeah. You," Joshua replied. "Hey Severus,"

"Yeah?" He looked up from the crumpled note in his hands and at the young boy.

"Are you coming around this Christmas?"

"I don't think so. This place has too many memories," He replied.

"Because of Charlotte ?" Joshua asked.

"Mainly," Severus folded the note and put it in his pocket. He would look at it later.

"If you ever do, you're more than welcome to come and watch us skate," Joshua said finally.

"Thank you Joshua," Severus smiled. For the first time in almost a year he smiled.

_Christmas 1983_

Severus stood alone in his office leaning against the fire place with his head on the mantle. He didn't want to go home. Didn't want to see Joshua or remember Charlotte . He wanted to forget. He went to a loose brick in the floor near the fire, pulled out the brick and pulled out the note inside. He hadn't opened the letter from Charlotte . It would have been too painful. He sat down on the floor in front of the roaring fire for several long minutes before he finally opened the letter.

A winter scene stood before him. A skating pond and a bench. A girl, who looked like Charlotte stood waving to the lonely man on the bench. She colored it with crayons.

She had pointed arrows to the two figures. "Me" and "Severus". Severus started to cry. He hated Christmas, but this was a reminder of how he once had a happy memory about Christmas. He stood up, put the letter on the mantle and walked away not staring at it.

Charlotte's memory would forever stay in his heart. She was a reminder that not all children hated him. She was also a reminder that he at one point in time had a happy Christmas thanks to a little girl who looked a lot like Lily.


End file.
